Through the Bushes
by silentskeptics
Summary: Ella Micheals was sitting alone in the forest when all of a sudden, Brendon Urie from Panic at the Disco bursts through the bushes.Who knew she'd fall for him? Hard.Too bad Brendon's got a girlfriend in the way!Do not own any of the bands/songs mentioned.
1. Lost and Found

Chapter 1

Chapter 1  
The moon shone down through the treetops, illuminating every dark corner. I sat underneath an old oak, gazing at everything around me. Then, for a moment, I was brought back to reality and checked the time on my phone. It was about midnight. My friends probably hadn't even noticed I'd left yet.  
A few hours ago I had been at party, supposedly the biggest party of the year. But no one had noticed me, so i left. I liked it better here, it was calming here in the forest.  
Of course, the party was only down the street. So I could still hear the pounding music. It didn't help that that wasn't the only party tonight. The other party was the biggest by far.  
It was a party for all the Decaydance bands. Many kids tried to sneak in but there was very heavy security patrolling the area.  
And so here I sat, alone and cut out of both parties.  
I sighed, wasn't high school wonderful? At least I was graduating this year.  
There was a rustle of the bushes in front of me. I sat completely still, waiting. A humanoid figure burst out and stumbled towards me. The person was clumsy and tripped often.  
It was a man with chocolate, puppy-dog eyes. He had soft, brown hair that shone in the moonlight. I knew this man but what was he doing here?  
His skin was slightly green and a thin sheen of sweat on his brow. The man looked at me warily and then his eyes rolled back into his head. There was a muffled thunk as he fell to the ground.  
I sat dumbstruck for a moment, unsure of what to do. But he needed my help, something was wrong with him. I rose and approached him slowly.  
I patted all his pockets until I found a sleek, black phone. I scrolled through the contacts until I found a promising number.  
He picked up on the first ring.  
"Brendon? Where are you? We've been looking everywhere!"  
"Uh, this is Ella. I'm with Brendon now, in the forest next to the Decaydance party. I'm guessing you are there right now..."  
"Yeah!" he shouted over the music. "Is Brendon okay?"  
I examined Brendon quickly. He reeked of beer and when I checked his pulse, it felt a little slow.  
"I think he had an alcohol overdose."  
Ryan gasped. "We're on our way. Wait there, okay?"  
"Yes," I said.  
"Oh, and, Ella?"  
"Hmm?" I mumbled.  
"Thank you." The line disconnected.  
I closed the cell and put it in my sweater's pocket. I watched Brendon adoringly. He was the lead singer of my favorite band. In fact, I was wearing their shirt now.  
He groaned and his eyes fluttered open.  
"Who are you?" he moaned.  
"I-i..." I mumbled like an idiot. "I'm Ella. How are you feeling?"  
Brendon watched me warily for a moment and then his hand shot to his mouth.  
"Excuse me!" He jumped up and scrambled away. He put his hands on his knees and threw up. I politely looked away. He sat down again and leaned against the tree I had been sitting against moments ago. He took some deep breaths and wiped his mouth.  
"Sorry," he said. I noticed his words were slurred. He hiccupped.  
Man, how much did he drink?  
"Your friends are coming for you," I told him.  
"Who?"  
"Your friends. I called Ryan and told him where you were."  
"Who do you know me?"  
I laughed under my breath. "You mean why? You're famous. A lot of people know you, Brendon."  
He nodded slowly like he had forgotten and was letting it sink in. Then he moaned.  
"I feel horrible!" he whined. "I wanna go!"  
"We'll get you to a hospital soon. It's okay," I reassured him.  
We sat quietly for a while. He threw up two more times before Ryan and everyone else came. He arrived with four other people. He didn't need to tell me their names. I knew them already: Spencer, Jon, William, and Gabe. They all rushed up to us. Spencer and Jon grabbed Brendon by his arms and legs and began to haul him out of the forest, towards the road.  
I sat there speechlessly. This was a once in a lifetime chance but I couldn't ask for an autograph or anything, that would be wrong.  
"Ella. Can you come with us?" Ryan asked me.  
"Why should I?" It sounded wrong when it came out of my mouth. "I mean, I'd like to but I mean...why do you want me to?"  
"I think Brendon would like to meet his savior once he's better," said William.  
Once again, I couldn't speak. "Sure..." I managed.


	2. Emergency

We all piled into a minivan. We just barely fit. Jon and Spencer were in the back with Brendon, who was sprawled out on their laps, holding a paper bag in his hands. William and Gabe were in the next two seats and Ryan and I were in the front, he drove.  
Ryan's knuckles were white as held onto the wheel. He was clenching his jaw tightly and staring straight at the road.  
"Brendon, do you know how worried we were?" he complained like a mother. "We couldn't find you anywhere! I almost had a heart attack! You are lucky this girl saved you." He glance sideways at me. "Thanks again," he whispered.  
"No problem.." I whispered back.  
"Ryan..." Brendon groaned. "I am soooooooooooooooooooooooooo..." he dragged out the o's. "Sorry. I had to much to driiiiiink..." He hiccuped.  
"Don't do it again. It's dangerous."  
"Dude, stop nagging him. He's not in a good condition."  
To prove his point, Brendon threw up, once again.  
"Hurry!" Gabe commanded.  
Ryan stepped on the gas and we shot forward. The scenery was a blur all around us. The lights of the hospital came into view.  
Ryan slammed on the brakes and we all jumped out of the car. Jon and Spencer lugged Brendon to the front office.  
The elderly lady at the front looked up in surprise as we ran in.  
"Alcohol poisoning!" Willaim told her urgently.  
The lady pressed a button on her phone. "Dr. Percy, we need you in the front office now. It's an emergency."  
A young doctor burst through two double doors, a troop of nurses with a stretcher trailing behind him. He gave Brendon one look and swooped in to take him back into the rooms.  
"Only one of you can come back," he said.  
Everyone looked to Ryan. He nodded and stepped forward.  
"I'll go."  
The throng of people took Brendon back with an urgent pace. I hoped he would be okay. Poor Brendon...  
We all took a seat in very small, cloth covered seats. I traced the diamonds sewn onto them with my fingers as I listened to the steady breath of the famous people around me. We were all silent. I wasn't sure if it was from the current situation or because they didn't know me.  
"You from around here?"  
I glanced up to find Jon smiling warmly at me.My tongue became tangled in my mouth.  
"I-uh-yeah. I live only a few blocks from the forest I was in where I found Brendon."  
He nodded slowly. "How old are you...?"  
"I'm eighteen. I'm graduating very soon."  
"Awesome. Are you excited?"  
"Yeah, but I'm nervous for college," I told him.  
"That's good that you're going. Lots of kids don't these days. I'm sure you'll do great!"  
"Thank you, Jon. I'm Ella by the way."  
"It's nice to meet you.," he said.  
"I like your name," said Will.  
"Yeah, it's very pretty," Gabe added.  
Spencer smiled. "It suits you."  
They were all being so nice...This was my first time meeting them and we were all talking like best friends.  
Too bad this would be the last I saw them.


	3. Sleep Peacefully

Dr. Percy came out into the waiting room a few hours later.  
"You all can go see Brendon now. He is asleep though."  
We all rose out of our chairs. A few of my joints popped, I had been sitting too long. I stretched a little and then trotted after the doctor and everyone else.  
He led us to room 483 and drew back the curtain. Ryan was perched at the edge of his seat, sipping gingerly at a cup of coffee. He glanced up at or arrival and smiled so that it reached his ears.  
"Hi guys!"  
"How's Brendon?" Spencer asked.  
"Good. They put him on an IV drip and some antibiotics. He should be back to normal in a few days."  
"What about the tour?" asked Jon.  
Ryan scratched his head. "I don't know...I guess we'll have to cancel some shows until he is back to normal."  
"But, that means The Academy Is… will have to cancel too! We can't do that!" William gasped.  
"Well, maybe Cobra Starship can fill in. Gabe, what do you think?"  
Gabe looked up at the ceiling, brooding. "I think we can do that."  
Brendon stirred in his sleep, and we all watched him quietly. He looked so angelic laying there peaceful. It would have been better if he still didn't have the greenish tint to his flesh and sweat across his forehead.  
It was odd, seeing him quiet. Usually when I saw him, he was on stage, bouncing around with loads of energy. But now it was quiet...  
I sauntered over to the porcelain sink and wet a stiff brown paper towel with cool water. I approached Brendon and slowly wiped the towel over his forehead. He sighed in his sleep.  
I could feel everyone's eyes on my back. Why was I doing this? It was so embarrassing.  
"I think we can leave Brendon in your capable hands long enough to run to McDonald's. Is that okay, Ella? We'll pick something up for you," William said.  
"Uh, yeah it's fine. But I'm not hungry. Can you just pick me up a coke?"  
"Sure." I heard their shoes click on the linoleum floor as they left. The curtain was closed and then Brendon and I were alone.  
I continued to wipe away the sweat and then once it was gone, I wiped his forehead with a dry towel to remove the excess water.  
"Thank you, Ella."  
I jumped and dropped the towels on the tile. I hadn't realized Brendon had woken up. He smiled a little.  
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you."  
I took a deep breath. "I'm fine. Don't worry. How are you feeling?"  
He shrugged. "Okay I guess. I feel less...drunk. But I'm still tired."  
I pulled a chair up next to his bedside and looked at the floor. He was staring at me and it made me uncomfortable.  
"Thanks for saving my life. I had a feeling that even if I wasn't famous, you still would've helped me."  
I met his gaze. "Of course, that would be rude to just leave someone leaving there. Who would do that?"  
"You'd be surprised."  
Brendon spread his arms wide, like he was trying to hug me. Was he? Was that what he was telling me?  
"Yeah, I'm asking for a hug," he said, reading my mind. "I'd get up but.." He gestured to all the tubes and wires stuck in him.  
I rose a little in my seat to reach over the wires and wrapped my arms slowly around him. He squeezed me tight and whispered "Thank you" in my ear.  
After what seemed like eternity, I tried to pull away only to find he was asleep.  
Great.  
I didn't want to wake him; he was so tired and needed the rest. But I wouldn't be able to detach myself from him without him waking. There was only one thing to do.  
I rested my head on his chest and closed my eyes, listening to his steady breathing.


	4. Surprise

Someone was laughing at me, or maybe it was more than one. I could tell they were trying to keep it down but it just came out as snorts. I closed my eyes tighter. Why were they waking me up? I was so tired...They continued to giggle for what seemed like forever. I kept wishing they'd shut up.I felt an exhale of breath, a soft _shhhhh_. Then the memories came flooding.  
Finding Brendon Urie in the forest, taking him to the hospital, meeting Ryan Ross, Spencer Smith, William Beckett, and Gabe Saporta, falling asleep against Brendon's chest...  
My eyes shot open and my head flew up. A cluster of people were in the corner of the darkly lit hospital room. I looked at the man next to, my arms still around his neck. He smiled slightly.  
"I tried to make them quiet."  
I looked to the group again, one figure flicked on the lights. It was like staring into the sun. I shielded my eyes with my palms. The sound of footsteps approached me.  
"Here's your Coke," Spencer said.  
I let my eyes adjust and then looked up and him with sleepy eyes. I took the cold drink front his hand, little drops of condensation landing on the floor and my lap.  
I mumbled a thank you and took a huge swig of the Coke. I was finally awake but I felt like I had been hit by a semi. My back was sore from leaning forward as I slept.  
"You look horrible, Ella," said Gabe. "Do you want to go home? You could rest up for school tomorrow."  
"No, I-I'm fine," I said, but yawned uncontrollably.  
"Isn't your mom worried?" Brendon said quietly.  
"She can wait a little longer. I promise I'll go home this afternoon. She probably thinks I'm at my friend's house anyway. She doesn't mind. How are you feeling?"  
"Ehh, okay."  
Ryan stepped forward. He cleared his throat. "Ella, maybe you should go home now. Or at least leave the hospital for a little while."  
Brendon scowled."Why should she leave?"  
"Uh, well, you see, Brendon...Rachael's coming."  
"NO!" he wailed. "I don't want to see her right now!"  
"Who's Rachael?" I whispered to Spencer as Brendon continued to complain.  
"Brendon's girlfriend," he whispered back, "He doesn't want to see her because she deserted him at the party last night. I have some feeling he kind of wants to break up with her but can't."  
"Why?"  
"Let's just say that if he did, things wouldn't be pretty. Trust me."  
"UGH!" Brendon screamed through a clenched jaw. "Why did you tell her I was here?"  
"I didn't!" Ryan defended. "She just called me and told me she was on her way. She'll be here any minute and if she see's Ella, things won't go well. She'll kill you."  
There was a knock at the door. Everyone froze, looking to the sea foam green curtain blocking the door. It creaked as it opened and I was shoved into the closet.  
"Hello?" asked a high pitch voice.  
"Hey, Rachael," everyone mumbled.  
I peeked through the small crack in the door. A blond girl stood near Brendon's bedside. You could tell she dyed her hair to be that blond, but I figured she had always been blond at heart, if you knew what I meant. She also looked to have implants and that just grossed me out, why would Brendon date _her_?  
She frowned, a little pucker appearing between her perfectly plucked eyebrows.  
"Brenny, what happened last night?"  
"I drank too much, okay? After you deserted me," Brendon huffed.  
"I didn't desert you, baby," she cooed, moving closer to him.  
He tried to move back a little but he winced and was forced to stay put. Rachael put her hands on his chest and kissed him fiercely. Brendon moved his head a little but Rachael quickly took hold, anchoring it down.  
My heart sunk to the floor.


	5. New Friend

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I kind of messed up on chapter four because some of this chapter was posted on it but I really disliked how I was writing chapter 5 so I rewrote it. So, I'm sorry, and hopefully this doesn't confuse you or anything. Here's the real chapter 5!

Rachael stroked Brendon's flushed cheeks. "I love you," she purred.  
"Yeah, love you too," Brendon mumbled.  
His eyes rose to the crack in the door. Even though he couldn't see me in the darkness and enveloped in the gowns and robes, the stare still made me uncomfortable. A prickling heat rose up my face.  
Just then, a tickling feeling appeared in my nose. A sneeze. I tried holding my nose but it still itched.  
Crap.  
I sneezed. Hard. Everything fell silent. Out of the crack, I saw Rachael frown. She stomped over to the door, her stilettos clacking on the tile.  
"Excuse me? Who's there?" she growled.  
I pressed my back against the wall but I could see her staring right at me.  
"Who are you?"  
I sighed and stepped forward. "I'm Ella Micheals. I saved Brendon."  
Her demeanor softened a little. "Oh, well, what are you doing in the closet?"  
"I-uh-I'm not sure."  
She snatched my hand and yanked me out into the light.  
"You're pretty, Ella." Then she turned to Ryan and the rest of the group. "Why were you hiding such a pretty girl in a closet?"  
No one answered her. She looked me up and down: I did the same. Her teeth were irregularly white teeth and her hair was too blond...When I looked at her, a word popped into my head.  
Maneater.  
"I'm Rachael, Brendon's girlfriend."  
"Hi Rachel."  
She dragged me over to Brendon's bedside.  
"Have you thanked Ella yet, sweetie?"  
Brendon nodded, and continued to stare at me. "Yes, I did. But thanks again, Ella."  
I gulped. "You're welcome."  
Rachael gripped my hand tighter. "If you're doing okay, I'm going to take Ella with me to the local bar. All this excitement is making me thirsty. I Budlight would do me good."  
A pucker appeared between Brendon's eyebrows. "Ella's only eighteen...."  
"Oh, who cares? I'll get her in. We'll be back later."  
"Bye, Brendon," I murmured.  
I walked out the door unwillingly.  
"I think we are going to be good friends," Rachael said. She smiled in a way that gave me a bad feeling. But maybe she was serious....  
We headed down the street to the bar.


	6. A Dark Curtain

"What can I get ya?" asked a scruffy guy at the counter.  
I looked to Rachael for help; I'd never been to a bar before, I didn't know how this worked. I didn't even drink.  
"We'll just take two beers."  
He grabbed to big glasses from under the counter and put them up against a nozzle. Light brown fluid came out. He set in front of us with a thunk.  
Rachael put money on the table. "Thanks."  
We perched on two stools. Rachael grabbed her drink and drained it. I watched my uncertainly.  
"Go ahead," she encouraged.  
I gnawed on my lip, weighing my options. If my mom found out, she'd kill me. But if I declined the drink, Rachael might not want to be my friend. And time with her meant I would get to see Brendon again.  
I swallowed it in three gulps.  
The beer was like gasoline to me. I choked once then held back the gag. I burned my throat. Ugh, I thought, that was nasty.  
Rachael smiled her ultra white smile. "You're cool, Ella. Cooler than any eighteen year old I've ever met. So mature for your age."  
I swallowed hard. "Thanks."  
She drummed her red, manicured fingers on the wooden counter. We sat there quietly: an awkward silence. I racked my brain for topics.  
"So tell me about you and Brendon."  
She clicked her tongue on the roof of her mouth. "I had a feeling you would mention that."  
I shrugged.  
"Well, I love Brendon a lot. But, between us girls, he doesn't 'satisfy' all my needs. You know what I mean? Like it seems like he is afraid to make a serious relationship with me. That's why I sometimes go out with other guys."  
"Why don't you just break up with him?" I asked, interested now.  
"I don't know how he would handle it...if I knew he'd be fine, then I probably would end it. But I love him and couldn't see him hurt. Also, I'm just so used to having him around. I don't know how I could live without him."  
"That makes sense...I guess."  
"What about you? Do you have a boyfriend?"  
"Sadly, no. My old boyfriend moved last year. We lost touch."  
She frowned. "That's so sad!"  
I traced the wood lines in the counter. "Yeah. But I'm okay."  
She looked at the watch on her phone. "We should get back to the hospital."  
We stood up. My vision was blurry and my head felt light. The room was spinning.  
"Whoa," I gasped, holding onto my stool.  
"Ella? What's wrong?"  
My feet flew out from under me and the world went black.


	7. Until We Meet Again

"Ella? ELLA!"  
My lids fluttered open to see Brendon and Rachael standing over me. I could see Jon next to Brendon, holding him steady. Brendon was still in his hospital gown and was clutching a metal pole with his IV attached.  
"Are you okay?"  
I nodded feebly. "Yeah....What happened?"  
"You passed out," Rachael said."In the fall, you hit your head and started to bleed." Tears were rolling down her soft cheeks. "I didn't know what to do so I called an ambulance and they brought you here. I was so scared." A sob broke through her chest.  
"Rachael, it's okay. I'm fine."  
She sniffed. "I'm so sorry, Ella. This is all my fault. If I hadn't taken you to the bar, you would have never gotten dizzy and fell and then you never would have hit your head."  
"She said she was okay, Rachael. You don't need to apologize," Brendon told her, a defensive glint in his chocolate eyes.  
The same doctor that had taken care of Brendon strolled into the tiny room. Dr. Percy, I remembered. His curly red hair hung in his face as he skimmed through some papers on a clipboard.  
"All your x-rays seem in order," he said. "I think you will be able to go home now. But have someone else drive you home. You still might be a little lightheaded."  
"Yes, Doctor. We'll make sure she gets home safe," Jon said, speaking up.  
Brendon shot him a look. His mouth formed the words "Does she have to go home now?" Jon nodded.  
Dr. Percy sauntered back into the hallway. Rachael helped me to my feet and I realized that I was still in my jeans and sweater. Crimson droplets colored the neckline of my shirt; it still had the metallic smell. It just made me more nauseous. The room flipped a few times.  
"I'll drive her home," Rachael said, gripping my arm tighter and watching me sadly.  
"No, you should stay here. You just had a few beers; you don't want to drink and drive. Ryan can drive her," Jon said.  
Ryan's head popped into the doorway. "I'll do what?"  
"Drive Ella home."  
He smiled. "Okay. It'll be my pleasure."  
I was passed from Rachael's arm to Ryan's. His grip was strong and firm. He carefully guided me into the bright hallway.  
"WAIT!"  
Brendon shuffled into the hallway, Jon grabbing at his hospital gown to make him slow down so he didn't exert himself. His arms wrapped around my waist and squeezed hard enough to break my ribs.  
"Thanks again, Ella. I'm really going to miss you." A hot drop hit my cheek. He whispered," You're probably the nicest person I've ever met, but don't tell Rachael or the guys that." We shared one last laugh but it was small and disappeared quickly.  
He pulled away and quickly wiped his eyes with the back of his hand.  
"Bye, Brendon," I choked out. "Bye, Jon. Bye, Rachael. Oh, and tell Spencer goodbye too. Maybe you guys will come on tour near here someday soon." I seriously doubted it though, my town was so small you could barely found it on a map. It was not a hot spot for concerts.  
"Get better soon," Rachael and Jon said together, watching their feet. "Hopefully we'll see you soon. Bye."  
Brendon was staring at me with red eyes.  
"Bye."  
Ryan led me out the sliding doors. I as greeted with a blast of fall air. The blast made my eyes water which only added to the tears that were pouring down my face.


	8. Must be Fate

A month or so passed slowly, nothing of interest occurring. School dragged on and the days fell into a plodding routine.

It was a Tuesday in November. The air was chilled early this year and my best friend, Melanie, and I were outside for lunch today despite the cold temperature. We were perched on a wooden picnic table, chatting about anything that popped into our minds. My backside was beginning to get cold.

"So….It's cold, isn't it?" Melanie asked, fingering the buttons on her jacket.

"Yeah," I sighed.

"What's going on with you lately? You're so depressed."

I hadn't told anyone about Brendon, Rachael, Ryan, Spencer, and Jon. I didn't want all that attention it would bring. Plus, what was the point? They were gone anyway.

"It's nothing. Just…uh…fall's here. The warm weather is vanishing. You know how I like the warm weather." I stuffed my hands into the front pocket of my hoodie.

I was wearing the same sweatshirt I had been wearing the night I'd met Brendon. If I tried hard enough, I could still smell his cologne and the faintest touch of alcohol. I refused to let my mother wash it, which, to tell the truth, was pretty nasty. But I made sure it stayed as clean as I could keep it. I hadn't even put it on until today.

I figured that eventually I would forget I had ever made friends with all of them. But we barely had time to even meet; it had been only one day. Which, in a sense, made it more painful yet made it seem like I should be over it by now.

But Panic at the Disco were my musical idols! It was all so confusing.

My frozen hands dug deep into my pockets, seeking the warmth like a bug to a light. They found something else. Something cold. I fished it out and stared at the thing in my hand.

It was a cell phone and it wasn't mine.

I flipped it open and a message popped up. The phone had seventeen missed calls, ten new messages, and thirty-seven text messages. I scrolled through the messages first. Most of them consisted of the same thing.

**From: Ryan**

**To: Brendon**

**Ella? It's Ryan. You have Brendon's phone. We need it back. Give us a call and we can come pick it up from you. Cya. **

**Sent at 10:45 pm**

**From: Jon**

**To: Brendon**

**Ella, we've been trying to reach you forever! Why won't you answer? You have Bden's phone and we need it. Call me.**

**Sent at 12:05 pm**

I flipped through the contacts and picked Ryan's number. Melanie was watching over my shoulder the whole time, her brow knitted in confusion. The phone rang, mocking me.

"Hello?" asked Ryan.

"Ryan? It's Ella."


	9. Alarm

"Ella?" he said, a little bit of doubt in his tone. "Is it really you? Where have you been for the past month? Why haven't you returned our calls?"

"Sorry, Ryan, Brendon's phone was in my pocket and I haven't worn this sweater until today!"

"Did you say Ella?" asked a voice in the background. "BRENDON! GET OVER HERE!" they screamed so loud it practically shook the phone. I then realized it was Jon.

"Ella," Ryan said,"Brendon would like to speak to you."

"Okay," I said, smiling.

Melanie gave me another look. "What are you doing?"

I waved her away. My mouth formed the words "I'm sorry. Go ahead and go back to class." She stood up and began to saunter away. Melanie looked back a few times.

"Ella!" panted Brendon a few seconds later. "Hi!"

"Hi Brendon," I said. "What's up?"

"You have my phone."

"Yeah, I know."

"We're in California at the moment. We can swing by and pick it up. Where do you live?"

"San Luis Obispo. Near the park, remember?"

"Oh, okay! We'll be there in a moment."

"Bye," I said.

"No wait. It's Friday. Do you think your parents would let you hang out with us this weekend? We're not leaving the state or anything. We could take you out of school early."

I sighed. "They'd never let me get out early unless it was an emergency."

"I never said they'd have to find out."

"What?" But he hang already hung up.

********************************

I strolled down the hall to my next class, Brendon's phone heavy in my pocket. I was grinning ear to ear. I would get to see them today!

"'Sup, Ella?" said a familiar voice.

I whirled around to see Brendon's angel face staring back at me. He put a long finger to his full lips, telling me to keep quiet. He took a few steps backward through the crowd of oblivious students. He rested against the white wall, looking casual. His palm surreptitiously rose to a bright red box and flicked down the white switch that had "DO NOT TOUCH" printed in bold letters on the front.

"Oops," he mouthed.

An ear shattering siren ripped through the hallways, girls shrieked and guys dropped their books. Teachers scrambled into the hallways, grabbing all the kids in their perimeter and corralling them towards the door. Brendon galloped back to me and grabbed me around the waist. His muscular arms whisked me into the girl's bathroom behind us and into the handicapped stall.

"Need a boost?" he asked, cupping his palms together to make a perfect step stool.

"Thank you," I said and put a foot in his palms. I opened the frosted glass window and climbed out into the chilly air.


	10. Reunion

Brendon snatched my hand again and bolted full force towards the visitor's parking lot. We had to make it quick because students and teachers were already making their way outside. If anyone saw me cutting, I'd be dead. If anyone saw me with Brendon, I'd be dead. My tombstone would read "DEATH BY FANGIRLS". That would be worse than getting caught by the teachers or my parents. Crazed girls could be dangerous, I would know. I was one myself a few months back before I met Brendon.

A familiar van pulled up in front of us and the door swung open. Brendon leaped in, dragging me behind him. The seats had been put down to make room for the few guitars in the back and the other person inside. We tumbled on the bare floor, Brendon ending up on top of me. The door was closed and the car sped away.

"Hello!" Brendon said, hugging me quickly and then rolling off of me.

I took a few deep breaths to regain the breath that Brendon's weight had knocked out of me. "What were you thinking? You pulled the fire alarm!"

"Yeah, pretty sweet, huh?"

"You mean, pretty dumb!"

He sighed. "I'm sorry, Ella. I didn't have any other plans."

"No, I'm okay. Sorry, just a little stressed and happy and….everything. I'm a jumbled mess." I combed through my windblown hair. "Hi Ryan, Jon, and Spencer."

Spencer was in the back with us. He leaped forward from his crouch and hugged me. His face burrowed into my shoulder. "You didn't say goodbye to me, why?" His voice was muffled.

"I told Brendon, Jon, and Ryan to tell you goodbye…"

Brendon giggled. "Yeah, I'm sorry about that. We kind of told him that you hated him and that's why you didn't say goodbye. It was just a joke!"

Spencer pulled away and tackled Brendon and they wrestled on the floor.

"We were kidding!" Brendon screamed. Spencer laughed wickedly.

"Guys, cut it out!" Ryan demanded. "I'm trying to drive here!"

They stopped and each sat on the floor, panting. I had to giggle. The last time I'd been with them, there had been so much tension that there was no time for jokes. But now, Brendon was better and things were normal.

"It's been so long, Ella," Jon said, watching the road.

I nodded. "Too long."

"Hey, can I have my phone back before I forget?" Brendon asked. I chucked the phone at his head. "AHHHHH!" he screamed and fell down again in mock pain. "Help, I've fallen and I can't get up!" he cried, imitating a commercial.

We all cracked and laughter filled the van. Tears were streaming down Ryan's face and Spencer was rolling on the floor. Jon clutched his stomach. I was gasping for air and praying that I wouldn't accidently snort or something embarrassing.

As we continued to laugh for no reason, Brendon leaned in to whisper in my ear. His sweet breath caressed my flesh.

"I need to talk to you."


	11. Hiding

We pulled up to a large building about twenty minutes later. It was the venue that Panic at the Disco was playing at tonight. Ryan drove around back to a small parking lot and parked. We unloaded into the November air and huddled together in a circle, all wrapped inside our huge winter coats.

"Let's go inside; it's freezing out here," Ryan said. "We could all watch a movie in the dressing room."

"You guys go ahead. Ella and I are going to take a little walk," Brendon informed them.

"You're going on a walk…in this weather?"

"We want to catch up."

"You can do that in the dressing room."

"But I like walking, so ha! Go ahead and start a movie, we won't be long," Brendon urged them. They nodded and went into the back door. I could only imagine the toasty air inside. How could _this___be fall? It was even colder here that in my town. Good thing I had my coat with me when Brendon pulled me out of school, I thought.

We began walking down an alleyway. Grime-covered brick walls bordered us on both sides and a few turned-over trash cans dispersed their garbage under our feet. Paper twirled around us in the wind. It smelled of rotting. Brendon stopped in the middle of the alley. His back rested on the colorful graffiti behind him. His crossed his arms.

"So…" I began. "What's up?"

He exhaled, his breath like white smoke as it curled around his face in the arctic air. "I….Do you-…..What-?" He looked down, searching for the right words. He gnawed on his lips. Brendon's hands flew to his face, hiding them as if in shame. "I don't know, never mind."

I stood next to him, a hand sympathetically resting on his shoulder. "No, it's okay. What's wrong?"

He sighed. "I need your advice. It's about Rachael. Should I break up with her? I don't think our relationship is working anymore. She's always flirting with other guys."

"Well, don't be mad at me, but-."

"I could never be mad at you."

"Thank you," I said, smiling. "But Rachael told me in confidence that she was thinking of breaking up with you. She said you 'didn't satisfy her needs'. But she didn't because she was afraid you'd be upset."

"That's fair. I wasn't really ready for a relationship at the time we were dating. Plus, I didn't feel very close to her. Thanks Ella."

"Hey, it's what I'm here for. So are you breaking up with her?" I asked.

"Yeah, I think it's the best thing to do."

I reached out and grabbed his shoulders, pulling him close. My long arms wrapped around his waist. For a moment, he didn't move. Then, his arms wrapped around me too and hugged me hard enough to break my ribs. Again. Why did he always hug me so tightly?

He sighed softly. I looked up at him, straight into his coffee colored eyes. There was something hidden there, something just below the surface but I couldn't put my finger on just what it was.


	12. The Idiot

The soft white wisps of his breath curled against my skin as he held me lightly in his arms. I was thankful that his grip on me had loosened. I watched his eyes as they skimmed over my face. I noticed that they paused for a second on my lips.

"Ella, I think-." Once again, he had lost his words.

"You think what?" I asked, still watching his eyes, searching for what I had seen hidden a moment before.

"Can I have your advice again?"

"Of course, what's wrong?" I asked, curious.

"I think I'm in love."

I drew in a sharp breath through my teeth. Why hadn't I seen this before? Brendon wanted to break up with Rachael because he had found someone else. I wondered who it was. I racked my brain for possible names that he might have mentioned.

"With who?" I decided to ask.

Brendon rolled his eyes. "You don't know?"

I bit my lip. Was I supposed to know? "No…"

"It's you, you idiot!" he laughed.

Man, I _was _an idiot! I blushed but you could barely see because my face was already red with the cold. But I didn't feel any cold, all I felt was a warm sensation running up and down my body like a fire lapping at my flesh but never burning. It felt wonderful.

"Really?" I whispered, my voice somewhat unsure of its self.

"Yes. How could I not be? You saved my life and you're just an all around good person. And I mean," he touched my lips with a gloved hand, "you're beautiful."

I gasped; no one had ever told me that before, except for maybe my family. Not even my ex boyfriend had told me that. The fire only got stronger. I reached up and touched his cheek with my numb fingers. His skin pressed down softly and I wished I could feel it. The fire and cold made me completely unfeeling.

He ducked down and pressed his full, now blue with cold, lips to mine softly, than harder. His hands cupped me face carefully and then slid down to my shoulders.

And luckily, this I could feel.


	13. Something That Needs to be Done

"Oh, sorry," a voice mumbled.

Brendon pulled away from me but still kept me wrapped in the warmth of his arms. We looked at the mouth of the alley to see Jon standing with his hands in his pockets. His face was flushed-not from the cold- and he was staring at his shoes.

"It's okay," Brendon assured him. "Uh-we were just heading back inside. Right, Ella?"

I nodded, not trusting my voice. I was still a little dazed. My head was feeling light, like I was floating.

Brendon guided me forward, his hand resting lightly on the small of my back. It was a good thing he was pushing me forward a little, I wasn't sure I could make my legs move. We walked with Jon up to the back door of the venue and he opened it for us. I became enveloped in the toasty air.

I slid out of my coat and placed in on a wooden hook to my right. There were two other familiar coats on it- Ryan and Spencer's. Brendon and Jon followed suite and then Jon stepped in front of me. He walked forward and made a sharp turn into a long hallway. We followed him as he went to the last door on the left.

Inside were four mirrors with small, yellow light bulbs surrounding each one. The counters below them were adorned various bottles of makeup and hair products. Ryan and Spencer were sitting on a plush, red couch pushed against the back wall. There was a big-screen T.V. turned on to a football game that no one was really watching.

"Hey, guys!" Ryan said. "Where were you?"

"Oh, just walking, like I said," Brendon told him, a hint of a smile on his pink lips. I stared at the white carpet, my face hot.

Spencer nodded. I could tell he knew, but Ryan still seemed clueless. He patted the space next to him.

"Well, why don't you two sit and watch T.V. with us?" he asked.

"Sure, but I have to do something first." He ducked down and whispered in my ear, "I just have to wrap something up. I'll be right back."

He pulled out his cell phone as he headed for the door. I saw the number that was selected before he disappeared.

Rachael.


	14. Anxiety

I sat on the couch, curled up near the armrest; I felt anxiety like an icy ball in the pit of stomach. I wrung my fingers nervously. I could see Spencer watching me out of the corner of my eye. It was still obvious that he was aware of everything going on.

I was worrying about Brendon's choice. This choice was certain to ruin any hint of friendship between Rachael and me. She would be furious at me; I knew it. And I knew Brendon's choice was wrong; I wasn't right for him. I was a nobody. Maybe I should end this before it got too far. The thing was I didn't _want_ to.

The squeal of a door on its hinges sent a shock through my nerves. I whirled around in my seat and watched as Brendon came in, a blank expression on his face. He plodded forward and sat on the armrest, the phone in his hand. His arms outstretched and put the device in my palm.

"She wants to talk to you."

I looked up into his coffee eyes and felt a pang of fear. Rachael was going to tear me to shreds. I hoped I would get a proper burial.

"Okay," I said through unmoving lips. I gripped the phone and slowly walked out the door.

The door slamming closed was like a symbol of my doom.

"Hello, Rachael," I said tonelessly into the receiver.

"Hey-uh-this is awkward….." she said.

"Wait, I just want to tell you I'm sorry. I didn't mean to ruin your relationship…"

"No, no, you didn't. It might have just been meant to be but I know we still love each other in a way."

I sighed quietly. "Yeah, I know."

"I'm truly not that mad," she said.

"But you're still mad."

She exhaled heavily. "Yes, but not at you; I'm mad at Brendon. Aren't girls always mad once they break-up?"

"Well, yeah but-."

"So don't worry, Ella. I'm not mad at you! We're still friends. I'm just mad at Brendon; I'm going to miss him."

I gulped. "Yeah."

"Well, hey, I better go. I got your number from Brendon so I'll text you sometime. Okay?"

"Okay. Bye." I closed the phone.

A thousand pounds lifted off my shoulders and I sighed.

_That was unexpected, _I thought.


	15. Smashed

I trudged into the cramped dressing room and placed Brendon's phone in his hand. He raised his eyebrows at me. It was a look that could only mean "What happened?" I shrugged and sat next to him on the couch.

Jon was sitting at my feet, watching the game. Ryan leaned forward, staring at his feet. His eyes almost closed a few times until after a few minutes, they did close. He snored softly and his head bowed. Spencer gave him a light shove and he jolted upright.

"Sorry," he mumbled and rubbed his eyes. "I have a horrible headache and the aspirin we have makes me sleepy."

"Oh, it's okay," Spencer said. "Want me to run to the drug store and get some non-drowsy aspirin?"

"That'd be great."

"Okay, I'll go after lunch."

Brendon shook his head. "No, Spencer. I'll go; I have to get some stuff anyway."

Spencer nodded. "Sure, thanks Brendon. "

There was a knock on the door and it opened. In the doorway stood a stout woman who was pushing a metal cart stacked high with food. There were things of every sort- soda, sandwiches, hamburgers, fruit, water, desserts, beer, and even soup. It made my mouth water; I didn't realize how hungry I was.

The lady rolled the cart inside and closed the door with a slam. Brendon, Jon, and I went up first and Ryan and Spencer stayed put. I grabbed an apple, a cheeseburger, and a Coke. Brendon and Jon both loaded their plates high with just about everything. We sat down and began to eat our lunch.

Everything was really good. Brendon gave me a few bites of his cake- white with chocolate icing. The cheeseburger was good and the apple was juicy. I chugged my soda. Ryan didn't eat much; I guessed he still wasn't feeling good. He picked around everything and randomly stabbed things with his fork.

"You have to eat something," Jon told him, concerned.

"I will, but I don't feel good enough to right now."

Brendon placed his plate on the side table. "I guess I better go get that aspirin now. Want to come, Ella?"

"Sure," I said and tossed my empty paper plate in the trashcan.

As we walked to the back door, towards the car, Brendon slipped his hand in mine. We donned our coats and slipped into the arctic air.

"This won't take long," he assured me, squeezing my hand.

"Oh, I don't mind."

We walked toward the van, Brendon a little ahead of me. He stopped abruptly and I almost ran into him.

"What?" I asked.

I looked at the van. It was lower to the ground than normal. Pieces of black rubber were strewn about and shards of glass crunched under my shoes. The van had been vandalized.


	16. Love Hurts

"What the hell?" Brendon screamed. He dropped my hand and moved closer to examine the damage. The front window had been smashed and every tire was slashed, the black rubber thrown about the area.

"Brendon…?" I asked quietly.

He didn't respond. He looked through the hole in the front were the glass should have been. He was staring at something, a hard pucker in between his eyebrows and a frown on his lips. They slowly curved to what looked like a growl.

"What is it?" I asked. I came to stand behind him. I looked down at what he was looking at.

Carved into the dashboard, in sharp letters, were the words LOVE HURTS.

"No…" he mumbled. "No, no, no."

I brushed his hair out of his eyes and shushed him. "It's okay."

"No, no it's not. Why would she do this? She said it was ok!" He exhaled one, sharp breath. "Let's go." Then he proceeded to drag me towards the door.

Brendon stopped in the doorway and wrapped his arms strongly around me. He leaned down and pressed his lips to mine softly, sending warmth through my body.

"I'll be back soon," he murmured, his lips brushing against mine as he spoke.

"No, wait," I began, stretching up on my toes and holding his head between my hands, "I'll come with you." I kissed him again.

"I don't want her to tear you to shreds," he whispered.

I rolled my eyes. I'd already considered that before. "I don't care; I'm coming."

He sighed, defeated, and hugged me for another moment. He fished a set of keys out of his pockets and walked to another car in the far corner of the lot. I walked behind him. He opened the door for me and soon we were speeding down the road.

"Whose car is this?"

"It's our manager's," he said, watching the road.

That's all we said the whole ride. About fifteen minutes later, we arrived at a small brick house with a wrap-around porch. Perched on one of the old wicker chairs was Rachael, as if she was waiting for us. She glared at us.

"I knew you'd come," she said as we climbed out, "but why'd you bring _her_?" Her voice was like acid.

"You have no right to do what you did; I could call the cops!" Brendon yelled.

And so the showdown began.


	17. Showdown

"Go ahead!" Rachael screamed. "I dare you to call the cops! You're probably too cowardly to anyway."

"I thought you said you were okay with us splitting up!" Brendon said, changing the subject.

"God, I _thought_ I was. But I love you, Brendon! I always knew you didn't feel as strongly about me as I felt about you, though. You didn't want a serious relationship with me but you'll have one with a girl who is three years younger than you? That's wrong."

Brendon ran at her. "Shut up, Rachael! You can't judge me like that. _You're _the one who went out with other guys while we were still dating."

"That's because you wouldn't have a serious relationship with me! It was like we were in middle school!"

"Oh, so that automatically makes it okay to cheat on me?"

"I wasn't cheating on you!"

"Then what would you call it, hmm?"

Brendon had got her there. She frowned and thought for a moment. Brendon smirked.

"I told you."

"God, I hate you!" Rachael screamed, tears streaming down her face and her eyes puffy. She rubbed them. "And I hate you too!" She pointed a thin finger in my direction. "You took the best thing from my life away from me."

"Do _not_ get her into this!" Brendon warned her.

"Oh, I will. This is all her fault."

"No, it's not. I said don't get her into this."

"Shut up, Brendon."

They continued to yell at each other. I could feel tiny tears bubbling in the corners of my eyes. They brimmed over and trailed down my cheeks. This was all my fault. Rachael was right. I watched as she looked over at me and stopped in mid-sentence. She laughed once, cold and hard.

"Ha, look at that! She's crying."

Brendon whirled around and saw me. His face twisted in rage and then he charged at Rachael and slapped her hard across the face. My mouth fell open; Rachael's did too. The sound seemed to echo through the empty street.

Brendon spun on his heel and strode towards me. His lips caught mine and he kissed me hard, probably trying to torture Rachael. One hand was cupped against my cheek and the other was holding my waist. His rhythmic heartbeat against my chest was soothing; I stopped crying. The movement of our lips was comforting and something familiar to me now.

After a moment, he stopped but left his lips against mine, prolonging the moment. When he did pull away, I noticed Rachael wasn't on the porch. She was probably inside.


	18. Apology

I pushed Brendon away.

"What was that?" I asked cautiously.

"I needed to put Rachael in her place," he said simply, seeing no wrong in his actions.

"You _hit_ her! You can't hit a girl!"

He chuckled lightly. "Well, she needed it. She needed to realize her and I are over."

"Yeah sure," I said, "but you hit her! You shouldn't have done that, Brendon. That was way too much; you could have injured her."

"So? This is Rachael we are talking about."

"She's still is nice. You should apologize."

He sighed, defeated and absently toyed with a piece of my hair. "You are just so nice."

Brendon pressed his lips softly to the top of my head. Then he left me and went to the car. He opened the door, got in, and closed it with a slam. The engine purred and white curls poured out of the exhaust. I banged on the window.

"I thought you were going to apologize!" I called.

"I _should_ apologize. That doesn't mean I'm going to," he said. "I don't regret anything." He smiled warmly.

"Fine," I huffed, "I'll apologize for you."

"Hey, Ella, wait-!"

I turned my back on him and stomped up the small walk to the weathered porch. My shaking finger pressed the doorbell and I heard a ringing sound from behind the door, quickly followed by footsteps. My heart pounded and I waited anxiously with bated breath.

"What do you want?" Rachael hissed when she opened the door and realized it was me. "Why don't you two just leave? You've already hurt me enough."

"I came to apologize for Brendon. We're sorry."

She rolled her eyes and snorted. "Get. Out. Of. My. Face." She made each word its own sentence.

Then she slammed the door in my face.

Anger ran through my veins. I kicked the door hard once, and then stalked back to the car. If she didn't want to apologize, so be it. I didn't give a crap anymore. I shouldn't, at least. I just couldn't see someone hurt like that but, like Brendon said, she deserved it.

"I want to go home," I said to Brendon when I climbed into the passenger seat.

"Home?" he asked quietly. "Like _home_ home?"

"My home for the next weekend is with you. So yes, home."

We sped off. I could have sworn I saw a flash of blond hair when I looked back at the old house, but then the curtain closed swiftly.


	19. Uncertain

We arrived at the venue in record time. Brendon jumped out of the car lithely and came around to my side. I climbed out and took his hand. He led me to the door.

"You don't mind sleeping in the tour bus for the next two days?" he asked conversationally.

"No, I don't mind."

He nodded. "Okay, that's good because that's where we'll be. The bunks are pretty comfy; you can take mine and I'll take the pull-out couch in the front."

"No," I insisted, "It's your bunk. I'll take the couch."

"But you're the guest and I'm the host so what I say goes and I say I'll take the couch."

"Well, there is an easy compromise..." I began, not wanting to argue over something so trivial.

"What is that?"

I shut my mouth, regretting bringing this up. It was too early for this kind of thing.

"Tell me," Brendon said, stopping in the middle of the parking lot and taking my face in between his hands.

I sighed. "We could share the couch...." I whispered.

He froze, unsure of how to respond.

"Well, I-uh- isn't that.....awkward to you?"

"Not really. You?"

He sighed. "I am three years older..."

"I though you said that doesn't bug you." I felt a little hurt.

"I don't." He kissed my forehead. "It just changes things. But if you want to share the couch, I will. But we're not....."

I interrupted him. "Oh, I know. I wouldn't ask you that."

"I know you wouldn't."

We continued to walk into the venue.


	20. Okay

"I'm sorry but this is too weird," I whispered as Brendon lay down next to me. "Can you go sleep in the bunk instead?"

He sighed. "Okay." I could sense the rejection in his tone. He grabbed his fleece blanket and trudged into the back. I heard the door slide close.

I felt bad, making him feel rejected. I just didn't want him or myself to feel like a slut because he was three years older than me. I did not want that reputation spread around; especially with all the paparazzi following the guys of Panic.

"I'm sorry, Brendon," I said, mostly to myself.

I closed my eyes, trying to clear my mind and go to sleep. I had no such luck. Images of Rachael's hurt face and scowl swum behind my lids. I bolted upright and looked at the coffee table across the room. I could see the silhouette of Brendon's cell phone.

I dialed the number, the screen lighting up the whole room.

"What do you want, Brendon?" she snarled when she picked up.

"It's Ella, actually."

"Well what do you want?"

"I....need to get something off my chest. I'm sorry I stole Brendon from you. I didn't know you still loved him so much; you had said you didn't."

"Well, I didn't know I still had feelings for him. I'm just sorry he doesn't feel the same." She sighed into the receiver.

"And I'm sorry for any grief I've caused. I'm not ready for a serious relationship yet, I need to take it slow with Brendon. I can't help but think he'd be better with you. I've never even had a long term boyfriend before."

"He's happy with you," she said tonelessly.

"But there's an age difference," I said.

"Listen," Rachael said harshly, "don't listen to what I said before. There can be any age difference and nothing is different, as long as you two love each other. My parents have a five year difference between them. I only said that to try to convince Brendon to come back to me. I'm sorry."

I was surprised at how quickly this conversation turned around. First, I had been the one apologizing and now Rachael was.

"Are we okay, then?" I asked uncertainly.

She paused. "I think."

"Good, I'll talk to you later, Rachael."

"Bye, Ella," she whispered.

I closed the phone and placed it in its proper place.

I tiptoed back into the bunk room; the sounds of soft snores filled the air. I went to Brendon's bunk and pulled back the curtain. His eyes were open and staring at the ceiling.

"You understand right?" I whispered.

"Yes."

I sighed. "That's good. You know I love you."

"I know. I feel the same about you."

I ducked down and kissed him softly on the lips. I knew then that we were going to be okay.


	21. Sunny Side Up

I awoke to the sun sneaking through the cracks in the blinds, a beam of the buttery light landing on my face. I sat up and stretched; my joints popping. The smell of toast and eggs wafted to my nose, sending my stomach into a frenzy of growls. I hadn't realized I was so hungry.

"Hello?" I called to whoever was in the kitchenette.

"Hey, Ella," replied Jon. He leaned down to look through a small cut out in the wall and smile at me. "Good morning."

"Good morning. You're making breakfast? That's nice of you."

"Well, I just figured I should because we don't have food service today, not being in a venue and all. It's only toast and eggs."

"Yeah but I'm starving," I said, my stomach growled to emphasize my statement.

"Come and get some food then!"

I jumped up from the pull out bed; it creaked from the loss of weight. I dashed to the kitchen and took the plate of hot food out of Jon's hands. It was simple but I really had no preference. It could have been burnt and I probably wouldn't have noticed.

"Brendon drove to your house when we stopped during the night. He's getting your belongings for the weekend," Jon told me as I chewed.

"That was nice; he didn't have to do that," I said between bites. "Actually, he shouldn't have done that."

"Well, he said you probably would want your things this weekend and said he had no problem catching up with us at our next stop, which is at a beach, actually. We're ahead of schedule so we're going to hang out there for a while."

I started. "Seriously?" I thrilled.

"Yeah, and Brendon said he'd be sure to tell your mom to back your swim suit."

I froze for a moment; I hadn't told my mom about Brendon yet, let alone call her. She'd kill me when I got back. But I brushed away the worry. I might as well enjoy this wondrous weekend while it was still here. Soon, I'd be back to textbooks and teachers.

I dug into my eggs, which were sunny-side up, representing my mood that morning.

"We should be getting there soon," Jon mused and went back into the bunk room to change.

I watched out the big, tinted window at the scenery. Before my eyes, the buildings thinned out and turned to small business and shacks. Deep blue water could be seen in the horizon and light brown sand lay before it. I got more and more excited with each passing movement.

Quicker than I expected, the bus pulled into a narrow side alley. It barely fit but we managed. The engine cut off and I dumped my clean plate in the sink. I exited the bus before everyone else.

I spotted Brendon leaning against the brick wall, a black duffel bag in one hand and a swim suit in the other. He smiled crookedly and I caught my breath. It was still hard for me to except that he was _mine_.


	22. When the Day Met The Night

White waves crashed against the shore. The horizon was a fiery orange that extended midway up the sky and then faded to a light pink. I'd always wanted to see the sunrise on the beach. It was magnificent. There weren't many people there that early but we all didn't care.

I sat on a beach towel on a tiny sand dune. Brendon, Jon, Ryan, and Spencer were already in the water, splashing at each other and dunking their heads to cool off. I reclined back onto my elbows and sighed. This morning couldn't be any more perfect.

A sliver of the sun peeked out of the horizon and the sky seemed to grow even brighter, the colors more vibrant. Soon, the pinks and oranges started to fade and were replaced by a soft baby blue. I spotted a few silhouettes walking out on the boardwalk in the distance. I knew the beach would be crowded soon.

I stood up, brushing sand off my legs, and trotted down to the water's edge.

"Hey guys," I called out.

They all turned to see me approaching.

"It's about time," Jon joked.

"Come on in!" Spencer insisted.

"Actually, I just feel like relaxing." I sat down right where I was, the water encircled my waist.

The guys shrugged and continued goofing around and I watched them. As the light grew, I realized that, in some weird way, they were kind of family to me.

A throng of kinds ran into the ocean at my right. I turned to find masses of people stomping through the sand. A group of teen girls froze once they got close to the water.

"Oh my God," one screamed. The others screamed and giggled insanely.

"It's Panic at the Disco!"

The four of them ran towards the guys and started chatting feverishly with them. The guys said hello politely and they talked for a while. Watching them being swarmed made me realize something else.

Brendon was sort of like the sun-bright and loved by everyone. He was cheery and cleared up a dark day. He was always in the public eye. I, on the other hand, was more like a star- lost in the crowds of a million others. I was never shining, like Brendon. I was just a twinkle among a bunch of almost identical stars. He and I were complete opposites.

How could the sun fall in love with a star?

I guess I was just a very lucky star. Thismust have been _my _chance to shine.


	23. The Answer

"Did you have fun today?" Brendon asked.

I nodded and wrapped a towel around my shoulders. The sun was setting; we'd spent the whole day at the beach. The sky was on fire. It was more brilliant than that morning.

We all trudged back to the alley where the bus was parked. My legs felt unattached to my body and when I fell onto the couch, I could still feel the waves smashing against me. Brendon sat next to me and placed my head on his lap. He was sleeping in seconds.

But I couldn't lull myself to sleep. My earlier revelations swam through my mind. I didn't want to be that tiny star in the distance anymore. I sat up and found an old acoustic guitar leaning against the wall. I knew it was tuned because I'd seen Ryan fiddling with it earlier. I'd never touched a guitar before.

I strummed and then glanced at Brendon; he didn't move an inch. I strummed a few strings; it didn't sound like anything, really. What was I doing anyway? I couldn't teach myself to play….I guess I just wanted to try something different.

I sighed and placed the instrument carefully in its rightful place. Maybe Brendon would teach me to play.

What was I thinking? I was never going to be famous.

I sat next to Brendon and lay my head against his shoulder. Concentrating on his breathing, I tried to sleep again. I imagined the sunrise again and Brendon sitting next to me. His smile was dazzling. My heart beat against my ribs.

He laughed at something I said and I joined in. His arm was draped around my shoulders lightly. Everything was perfect.

I didn't know when I slipped into dreams. The transition was smooth. One minute I was imagining and the next I was dreaming.

All that I knew was that my answer came in my dreams.


	24. Suspicious

I sat on a velvet bar stool with my Mac Air laptop before me. I loaded Microsoft word and unsurely began to brainstorm, making a list. At the top I put "Learn guitar" just as a reminder. That was going to be important.

I pressed the space bar and stared at the blank sheet. Nothing. I couldn't do it. My plan was not going to work.

"Ella?" Brendon murmured, stirring on his place on the couch. "What are you doing?"

I didn't answer his question. "Am I a nobody?" I whispered.

"What? No, Ella. You are _not_ a nobody. Why would you even think that?" he asked, jumping up and coming over to me.

His arms wrapped tightly around my waist and his head rested on my shoulder. His breath was soft in my ear. I could tell he was reading over my shoulder.

"Learn guitar? You feel like a nobody because you can't play the guitar?" Brendon snorted. "That's nothing to worry about!"

"No I feel like a nobody compared to you. No one could even pick me out of a crowd."

"I could. I could pick you out of any crowd, no matter how big. You are the most beautiful, most kind hearted girl I know," he said softly.

A red blush blossomed over my cheeks and my face felt hot. Brendon placed his finger tips on my cheeks.

"And don't be modest. Everyone knows that it's true. I'll teach you to play if that makes you feel any better. I love you." He reached around and kissed me softly.

I sighed. "I love you too. I bet it wouldn't have worked anyway."

"What were you planning on doing?"

"I wanted to write a song that you could sing at a concert so people could relate me to that. But I've had no experience with things like that so I don't have a clue of how to start," I explained hurriedly.

"Well, I could help you with it and teach you to play or I…" He trailed off.

"You could what?" I asked, weirdly excited for what he was going to say.

"Nothing; never mind." The corner of his mouth was twitching slightly.

Something was very suspicious.


	25. Oh, Shit

"Okay," Brendon began, placing an acoustic guitar in my hand, "play the beginning of Northern Downpour. Stop right before the vocals come in."

I nodded and began to strum the beginning chords, F and Bb. When I finished the intro, I looked up at Brendon hopefully.

"Good?" I asked.

"Yeah, keep going," he encouraged.

We went through the whole song, Brendon singing softly and me playing. I had to admit, I wasn't half bad. But, of course, this was still only my first song. Oh well, it was a start.

"You're doing well. You didn't mess up at all!" Brendon thrilled, wrapping me in a congratulatory hug.

"Thanks. You're a good teacher," I said.

"Well, I think you're ready."

"For what?"

"I'll tell you later but now I have to go get ready for the show tonight." He smiled slyly and then sauntered out of the room.

My stomach flipped. What surprise could he mean? Did this have to do with that weird look he had a while back? Ugh, this was going to drive me insane!

"Hey," called a voice from the door. I whirled around to find Spencer at the door. "Can you come with me for a moment? I'm supposed to help Brendon give you his surprise…"

That of course made me move. I bolted over to Spencer, anxious to get moving. He gave me an odd look and then made his way down the hall. We stopped on the last door on the left. The door rasped as Spencer yanked it open.

Inside was a love seat and a small counter with lights around the perimeter. It was just like any other dressing room.

"Can you wait here?" he asked. "It won't take too long, I promise."

I nodded and then took a seat on the love seat. The door closed behind him. I toyed idly with the tassels on my jacket, wishing I had something to do while I waited impatiently. I sighed. The hands on the clock inched around the clock and the constant _tick-tock_ was irritating.

After a while, someone pounded on the door.

"Close your eyes!" Brendon commanded.

I did as I was told and I listened as Brendon walked across the room. A cloth was placed in front of my eyes, tied around my head. Brendon leaned down in my ear.

"Ready for your gift?" he whispered as he guided me forward.

"Yes," I said.

I heard a huge roar that grew louder as we moved. It was like the sound of a waterfall. I wished I had my sight; it was hard to go by sound when you are so close to sight as well.

The roar only grew louder and then I could pick out words. It was a crowd.

"Panic!"

"I love you!"

Everyone was chanting things. Was I on stage or something? My legs started to shake.

"I hope you'll thank me for this later," Brendon murmured, ripping off my blindfold.

"Oh, shit," I said.


	26. Stage Fright and Cell Phones

"I'd like everyone to give a big hand for my girlfriend, Ella Michaels! She's going to play along with us for this song," Brendon announced proudly.

Some booed at me (mostly those crazy fan girls) but most were supportive. A few even whistled. Ryan grabbed a guitar that was leaning against Spencer's drum risers and handed it to me. I was shaking so hard I was sure I would drop it.

Jon plugged it in to the amp for me and then motioned for me to stand by him if I wanted. I shuffled over to my spot. He winked encouragingly at me.

Brendon smiled at me and then counted off. I strummed the intro uncertainly.

"If all our life is but a dream, fantastic posing greed, than we should feed our jewelry to the sea," Brendon sang.

We went through the song without any mistakes which was a miracle. Ever since I was a kid, I'd had major stage fright. The crowd cheered for us.

"Thanks," I said breathlessly into Jon's mike.

Then I flashed Brendon a surprised smile and ran off stage. Zack tossed me a towel. I wiped it across my forehead, ridding of the nervous perspiration. I sat down right where I was standing, waiting for my heart to slow.

The rest of the show past in a blur; all I remembered was some parts of the songs and then Brendon sitting down next to me.

"Did you like your surprise?" he asked cautiously.

I nodded blankly and then fell sideways, leaning my head on his shoulder. I hugged him thankfully.

"I'm not just a nobody anymore. All of those people know who I am. You gave me what I was hoping for. I can't thank you enough."

"You're welcome! I thought you were going to murder me though; you should have seen your face when I took the blindfold off!"

I punched him playfully and rolled my eyes. "Very funny, Brendon."

"Well, thank you!"

"Oh, shut up." I stuck my tongue out at him.

"Hey, everybody is going out tonight; you want to come with us? I think it'd be more fun with you along," Brendon asked out of the blue.

"Yeah, I'd love to go-."

My cell phone in my pocket rang.


	27. Heartbreak

"Ella, you are in _so _much trouble!" my mom screeched at me so loud I had to hold the phone away from my ear.

"Mom, I can explain!" I cried.

"Yes, explain to me why you left in the middle of school three weeks ago, never came home for winter break, and then never came home to go back to school. And then I turn on the TV to find you playing a guitar on stage!"

Crap, I forgot that winter break had only been two weeks, not three. I'd been having so much fun with the guys these past three weeks that I guess I didn't accept I would have to leave sometime. Thank God we'd never left California this whole time though; my mom would probably have a heart attack.

"Let me take a guess. Is this about some guy?" my mother asked.

"Yes," I said, looking at Brendon. "This is about a guy."

Brendon looked very worried. His eyebrows furrowed together in frustration and he wouldn't make eye-contact with me.

"Who?" she snapped.

"Brendon Urie."

She paused; the only sound letting me know she was still there was her deep breaths. "That guy from that band you love?"

"Yes."

"No way, you're lying!" my mother accused.

I held the phone up to Brendon's mouth. He mumbled a quiet "Hello".

She gasped. "Oh dear God, you weren't lying." Another pause. "You know this doesn't change the fact that you're still coming home_ right_ now, correct?"

"Yes." Then I shut the phone. "Brendon, I have to go home now."

"Can I drive you?" he asked softly.

"Yeah."

"I am so sorry, this is all my fault," Brendon said. I should have never brought you with us."

"Don't be sorry; this has been the best time I've had in ages. Thank you. Again." I kissed his cheek softly.

We walked outside into the chilly air, our breath hanging before us. This was going to be my last time with Brendon for a while. It was if my heart was snapping into tiny pieces with every step I took. We climbed into the car and began our way home.


	28. Six Months

Street lights cast odd shadows on Brendon face. He didn't say anything, his eyes on the road. My eyes were on him. He looked so helpless and guilty, although he didn't do anything wrong.

His lips were turned down in a frown and the space between his eyebrows was still puckered up. I sighed.

"You'll come back soon, right?" Brendon asked.

"Yes, I promise."

"And you promise not to move on with some other guy?"

"I promise. I love you too much."

He nodded and then went back to his silence.

*******

We pulled into my driveway and I was grateful that my mother wasn't waiting on the front porch. Now I had time to say goodbye. Tears threatened in my eyes.

"I…I'm going to miss you," I whispered, my head falling into my hands.

Brendon patted my shoulder softly as I sat there. He placed his head on my shoulder and we sat there for a moment. When I looked up he was so close. He kissed me goodbye.

Tears rolled down my cheeks and Brendon kissed them away, which of course, only made me cry even harder. He was so good to me.

"Shh," he said, his lips still brushing against my cheeks. "Everything will be okay."

I pressed my palm against his cheek. "Remember that I love you."

My free hand reached behind me for the door handle. I yanked it open and bolted for the front door, trying my hardest not to look back.

No lights were on inside; my parents probably asleep already. I fell onto the couch. When I peeked out the large, bay window, he'd already driven away.

Hey, I said to myself, you'll see Brendon again, after the huge grounding you'll receive in the morning of course. There's spring break and then summer. And once you graduate, you can tour with them maybe. Online college classes could work.

Only one thing stood in my way and that was six months.

Six months until graduation.


	29. Graduation

Melanie took a section of my hair gingerly and closed the straightener on it. I watched her work from the mirror on the bathroom wall.

"You know you don't have to work so hard on my hair," I said. "Hardly anyone will be able to see the style under my mortarboard.

"Well, if we are invited to any parties afterward, you'll be thanking me," she replied.

She busied with hair and makeup until, I had to admit, I looked stunning. She nodded in approval of her work. Then she slid the red graduation gown over my head, careful not to mess anything up, and then slid hers on too. The mortarboards were perched on the crowns of our heads.

"Wow, we look awesome!" Melanie cheered.

"We do! Thank you!" I wrapped her in a tight hug.

The high school band played the beginning of "Pomp and Circumstance" and the principal began to call student's names in alphabetical order.

I squirmed in my seat, eager to finally graduate. The six months went by surprisingly fast, although, there had been no word from Brendon. I shook away the thought; today I wasn't going to worry about him, I was going to celebrate.

"Melanie King," the principal, Mr. Rowling, called.

Melanie bounced up and trotted happily to the stage. Our eyes met and she flashed a giant smile, her whole face glowing. She shook Mr. Rowling's hand, taking the diploma from his other.

He called through some more names until he called mine.

"Ella Michaels."

I walked as gracefully and carefully as possible up the stairs and shook his hand. I smiled over at Melanie and my family in the crowd and, with a racing heart, walked back to my seat. That hadn't been so bad.

The rest of the students were called and the valedictorian, some dorky boy named Craig, made his speech. A shower of mortarboards rained over us as he came to a close. We gathered around one another, saying our goodbyes and good lucks. Then, the parents started to pour in. Of course, most had fat, crystal tears rolling down their cheeks.

"Congratulations!" said my mother, wrapping her arms around me.

"Thanks, Mom."

"Yes, congratulations," said a deep voice.

I turned, expecting my father, but it was someone else. A tall man in a dress shirt, a red nylon sports jacket, cargo pants, and large, thick sunglasses stood in front of me. His whole outfit seemed like he had picked it out in the dark. I guessed he was a superintendent but I didn't think the superintendent would ever dress like that. Maybe a staff member I didn't know?

"Uhm, thanks?"

"You're welcome!" Then he walked into the crowd, disappearing from sight.

"Who was that?" my mom asked.

"I'm not sure…"

I socialized a little bit more. Soon, I was almost ready to leave. I was just walking to my parent's car when…

"Hello again," said that deep voice.

I sighed. It was that creepy guy again. "Hello."

"My friend just wanted to congratulate you too."

I glanced at the man next to him. He also dressed oddly. He was in a baggy t-shirt that fit loosely around his waist, flip flops, plaid pants with a brown belt, and a pair of sunglasses, just like his friend.

"Congratulations!" he thrilled.

"Thanks." He went to shake my hand and I noticed the tiny black letters on his wrists….


	30. Celebrate

"AHHH!" I screamed, flinging myself at the two men, almost knocking them down. They caught me in their arms and held me tight. I took a deep breath, fighting the lump in my throat. I could just stay here forever.

"I….I…you guys! What are you doing here?" I stammered.

"Well, you graduated right? We were guessing that meant your grounding was over and done," Ryan said.

"Yeah, I guess you're right," I said, sighing.

"Jon and Spencer wanted to be here but we didn't want to attract too much attention so they're still on the bus."

"Nice costumes, by the way."

"Really? Thank you." He laughed.

I looked over at Brendon, who was watching me quietly. I peeked through his sunglasses to see those big, brown eyes I had missed so much.

"You look beautiful," he choked out.

"I'll give you guys a moment," Ryan said, detaching himself from our group hug.

I rested my head against Brendon's chest. It felt nice to hug him again, to feel his warmth. He stroked my hair softly and then pressed his lips to mine quickly. I looked around to see if anyone had seen but everyone was socializing with their friends and were oblivious.

"Can you come over for a while tonight?" he whispered. "I'll bring you back on time, I swear."

"Of course I can," I said. "And…if you wanted, I can stay with you guys for a while, before the semester starts. Now I am a legal adult and won't have to worry about my nagging mother. I'm still going to college so she doesn't have to freak out about anything."

"You're right and I'd love that. What college are you going to?"

"I got a couple acceptances. Maybe you could help me decide?"

He nodded and then squeezed me once more before letting go.

"Were you going to do anything special with your parents to celebrate?"

"We were going to go to dinner. I'll come after that," I assured.

"Good." He smiled warmly. "I'll see you soon. Call me, okay?"

I nodded. "Yes." I kissed his cheek and then ran off to the car.


	31. This Bus

I took a deep breath and peeked around the corner. Brendon leaned against the door of the giant black tour bus. A street light flickered above his head and I could see him glancing around every so often.

Why was I so hesitant to go over there? Maybe there was a small part of me that worried he had lost some of his feelings for me in the past six months.

"Come on," I whispered to myself.

I decided to count to ten first. When that didn't work, I tried fifteen and then twenty.

Sick with myself, I stepped out from behind the wall before I chickened out. Brendon did not see me right away. I stood as still as a statue, watching him. Then, his head turned in my direction and he froze. A wide smile blossomed on his lips. He slowly walked over to me.

"You came!" he breathed, wrapping his arm around my shoulder.

"You thought I wouldn't?"

"Well, I don't know. I wasn't sure-." He stopped abruptly.

"You weren't sure of what?" I asked. I looked into cautious eyes.

"I wasn't sure how you felt about me anymore." Brendon looked at his shoes.

I laughed and pulled him close. "Nothing has changed."

He smiled again and guided me towards the bus. Ryan, Jon, and Spencer were inside, sitting on a couch and playing Guitar Hero. Spencer threw the guitar down in mid-song and jumped up to hug me.

"Ella!" he said cheerfully.

"Ella!" Jon copied.

The guys invited me to sit on the couch with them and join in the game. I knew they would probably murder me; I didn't play this game much, just with my friends. Plus, these guys actually played the guitar. Well, I did too but nothing compared to them.

They paired me against Brendon.

"Now, don't let me win Brendon. Play fair!" I commanded.

"I will," he said, laughing.

The song started and we played along. In the end, Brendon won. I threw the guitar on the floor in mock agitation.

"How do you do that?"

"It's an obsession," he laughed. "I play it way too much."

"Oh, of course."

I was with my friends and boyfriend. We were having a great time. This bus felt like home.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Okay, now this is the end haha. I don't have any more ideas and I was disappointed with my story line near the end. So keep an eye out for a new fan fiction coming soon. It's going to be action! I hope you like it. (no title chosen yet).


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